Nothing sets the tone of a great girls' night out or lunch like a glass of wine, mimosa or a beautiful cocktail.
I am someone who has always become bubbly after a few sips of something with alcohol, it takes off the edge of being socially awkward and it's a great way to comfortably socialise and network.
I will admit though that I was never much of a drinker to begin with and so every time I told friends that I was giving up alcohol I was always asked, why? It's not like you have a problem.
That was true, however alcohol went from being fun to being costly to my health and emotional well being and my pockets.
After a night out of cocktails and a few shots I would wake up feeling sick and guilty.
Guilty because it's not something I was enjoying. It was great for the moment because it made me less nervous about my interactions with people but it would leave me feeling hollow.
I would feel hollow because it wasn't adding anything to my life. It would lead to me messing up a few commas and feeling drained
Also, it affects relationships.
Also, might I add that I was working on my relationship with God and trying to live a true and honest life.
I would fast for days to break free from alcohol but as soon as I finish my fast, I would be out on a brunch date with a friend ordering a cosmopolitan, margarita or pina colada.
I honestly am not sure what I said in my prayer that made me finally decide to give up alcohol and I found myself not craving a cold Brutal fruit spritzer on a cool Saturday, I haven't looked back ever since.
It's been two months now and I truly am proud of my progress. I know its still early to celebrate but I know in my heart that I'm serious about my decision.
I am now able to sit with my awkwardness when interacting with a new person and it's not as scary as it may have seemed.
Some friendships have fallen through because I can longer put myself in position that would make me compromise.
I feel better, I eat better and I have started taking care of my emotional and spiritual wellbeing.
My relationships with people are more authentic without being under the influence. I get to experience people as they are and not as their drunk selves.
I've made a few changes socially. I am able to say no to going to environments that would make me feel compelled to drink.
My relationship with God is flourishing (Girl, I said "flourishing" not perfect), he truly is doing a good work in me.
I am also healing from the trauma I have with alcohol at an young age of seeing my family members lose themselves to the substance with no point of return.
It's the best thing ever.
Being able to take care of myself, my gut health, my skin and my overall self-esteem. I am excited to creating authentic connections with people that will allow to continue on this journey of embracing myself.
