Lindiwe-tea-girl-Mazibuko was a devastating disappointment for the DA. So horrified were Madam Zille and all her White men by her performance that they shipped her off to some American university for a short-course of some sort. Her sell-by-date had come and she had to be off.
She was an ideal fit. Black. Woman. Young. Had an accent. Couldn’t have been better choice for the DA who were desperate to have a Black face. “See”, said middle-aged-White ladies whilst sipping their afternoon tea, “the DA also has Blacks. Isn’t Lindi nice, she’s so talented!” Sip, sip.
“Wow, I’m so dam proud of her”, said a relative of mine to me. Smile. Why? Because she had achieved, she had an education, had a (UCT) accent and she was glamorous; so un-Black but Black enough.
But DA theatrics almost beats EFF showcase. Act 1 of Rent-a-Black ends, in comes Mmusi-cum-Obama-Maimane. Decked in a masters degree in Theology, White-wife on the side and from Soweto nogals, this was the answer to Helen Zille’s Black man dreams. But she’s gonna be disappointed by his lack of action.
This week’s failed motion of no confidence in the Speaker, like its failed proposer and his failed predecessor was Obama’s-sorry-Maimane’s attempt to get back in the limelight. Remember, Juju and his cohorts had stole the DA’s limelight with #Paybackthemoney. Of course, Juju should pay the money to the tax-man.
So instead of being in competition, the DA thought, let’s just hire them. So Maimane ganged up with his bra Juju, Juju even defending his (Maimane) time given to respond, to do the batting for the ladies sipping their tea. In fact, he (Maimane) teamed up with his brother (Juju) from another mother (Zille or maybe Mamphi Rampi?) to defend their space in the limelight.
That’s why their parties have them there in the face place. Not so? EFF is nothing without Juju, their Commander-and-Chief (let's all bow), and would dissolve as fast as Floyd jumps for a point of order when Julius Sello Malema goes.
O'Maimane, of course, has been hired to get the limelight, he cannot be seen to be losing it. In fact, the old guard (that’s right old White men) have aired their displeasure, so he had to do something; something as silly as calling for the motion.
Predictably, Maimane could do only what his bosses have taught him: hire Blacks. That’s exactly what he did. The EFF fell for it, they’re being paid by old White money in any case. The EFF had no problem with doing the old money’s dirty work.
If I had voted for the EFF I’d be very disappointed cos there aint nothing revolutionary about doing the Madam’s dirty work. The DA just continued their normal business: rent a Black in Malema and his minions.