This is the character of Christ- that he loves everyone irrespective of their position, and also does not condone the wickedness which they perform. Paul speaking of wives would say ,"Wives respect your husbands" not "Wives respect your husband IF they only love you." Insulting because you feel insulted does not reflect that beauty Christ. Maybe this idea of "Respect is earned" is just some worldly excuse of not rendering pure service of love to fellow men.
We are commanded to love our fellow man, even when they hate you. To pray for them which purposefully use you and persecute. This is the example of the Begotten of the Father, Christ Jesus. He who when his enemies wrongfully accused Him did not fight back, but all that he did was to commit everything to the hands of the everlasting God. Are you having problems with loving your enemies? Problems with forgiving and respecting they who mistreat you or talk evil of you? It may be at your home or even at your work place you at now. But behold, The Lamb of God! He calls you to lay down your burdens to Him, for he cares for you. Come to him with the heavy burdens, and rest he will give you of your souls. Click TLG Ministries.