Just how much should you give?
When it comes to weddings, there's nothing more difficult than deciding what to get the bridal couple in question as a gift. It's easy when they have a gift registry, but what do you do when they ask for money?
In response to a
reader's dilemma, we've asked our
Facebook fans what they thought of couples requesting money as a gift and what they would consider the appropriate amount to give.
Here's what they had to say:
Julia: I think you give what you can give ... it's about the thought, not the amount.
Mary Ann Beeden: Give what you can afford.
René: Is there really a polite way to ask for money, instead of accepting gifts or gift cards? I think a registry is the way to go. However, sometimes the couple already has stuff, in which case a gift card is appropriate.
No matter how cute people try to make it, with catchy little poems etc, asking specifically for cash - I think it's a bit rude. You could have saved a ton of cash by having a smaller wedding.
Ihekire: When you check the price of a home appliance then you can give them the monetary equivalent.
Aurial: I think whatever you can afford should be sufficient, seeing that they requested monetary gifts. If they add up all that money they might be able to afford a small holding. Besides it's about those you hold nearest and dearest to you part taking in the most important day of your life. NOT THE MONEY.
Chana: I asked my guests for either a gift or money, however I did also stipulate that having them attend is gift enough. And we got mostly money or both. The min value I received was R300 which I appreciated immensely.
My suggestion to people that don't want to give money and that can't afford what's on the registry, is to either make the gift a personal one to the couple i.e. a bible etc or to get a voucher along the lines of Woolworths, Pick n Pay or Checkers. I got a lot of those vouchers and we lived like royalty for the first 2 months.
Tania: I think that no-one invites you to a wedding for the present, but because they want you there on their special day. If you can afford a big gift, you give a big gift, if you are flat broke that month, you give them a nice wedding card.
Ronel: 1. Gift card. 2. If it's a large item on gift list, you can add your name to list and shop will arrange for you to share big items. It works well.
Andrea: I feel very uncomfortable giving people money as a gift. I think it's rude to ask specifically for money, but it seems the trend these days. If people want to give money that's their choice, but don't ask!
Zukiswa: I also feel that no matter how polite one puts it, asking for money is a bit rude. I understand the concept of a gift registry but sometimes the items that are listed in there are quite expensive.
What do you think? Is it rude to ask people for money as a gift? And if the bridal couple did, in fact request money, what do you think is the appropriate amount to give?
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