Publications
Partners
I have this little thing called a JOB, which kinda takes up 90% of my day, so it’s not that I’m being rude. I’m just busy.
I find myself commiserating with other 8 to 5ers all the time. Often when we get together we just bitch about the following things:
Your WhatsApp is important to us
They should call it WhatSAP, because it saps all of the energy out of me.
I really want to reply to your WhatsApp, I do. But when I’m in the middle of a meeting or stressing my arse off about a big project, answering your "What are we doing this weekend?" WhatsApp isn’t on the top of my list.
If you think this makes me an asshole, you probably don’t have a job yet.
Image: Tumblr
My lunch hour is MINE
Look, if you waste even 2 seconds of my lunch hour I’ll NEVER FORGIVE YOU.
Just like, not in the next 10 years.
My lunch is MINE. I wake up at 5 in the morning to go to work, and I only get home at 18:30. All I have is that little hour in the middle of the day.
SO DON’T WASTE MY HOUR OF FREEDOM
Students
If you’re a student and you complain to me about not having time, I can’t guarantee that I won’t key your car out of anger.
Sit down. I need to educate you.
Yes, exams are stressful. Yes, I realise that you are under a lot of pressure to pass your tests. Nobody is saying that your studies are easy.
But don’t fugging come here and say that you don’t have time. You will never in your life have more time than during your studies.
I used to get really pissed off when people told me this as a student. I used to think to myself: "You don’t know what you’re talking about."
Turns out that they were right.
And while we’re on this topic: Nobody with a job wants to know about your holiday. Talking about your 4-week break to someone who only gets 1.25 leave days per month is like eating cake in front of an orphan.
Don’t.
Image: Tumblr
Tell us when events start AND end
When I was at school/college, I never cared about what time an event ends. I only cared about the time that it starts.
Now it’s more important for me to know when the event will be over, because:
- I need to plan my life
- I need to know if I’ll be tired at work the next day
- I need to know how much money I’ll need for parking
- Most importantly: I need to know how long I’ll have to wear tight clothes until I can wear my pyjamas.
Life’s a competition
This was totally a thing in high school and varsity too, but when you start working it gets kicked up a notch.
It’s always a constant competition about who has the busiest life and schedule.
Oh you have to work tonight?
SO WHAT. I have to work AND MAKE SUPPER AND DO WASHING AND OTHER HOME STUFF.
Oh you’re studying part-time?
SO WHAT. I HAVE TWO KIDS AND A HUSBAND WHO NEEDS ATTENTION ALL THE TIME.
I can give you a million examples, but the point is: When you have a job you feel the need to talk about how busy you are.
Hence this blog.
Friday nights are jammie nights
No, we’re not saying that we won’t go out over weekends. We’re just saying that sometimes (90% of the time) we’re not lus for any obligations on Friday nights.
It’s been a long, tough week. We just want to catch up on our favourite series in our ugliest, comfiest jammies.
Who knows, we might even watch a few cat videos while stuffing our faces with pizza.
Please just let us be. We can party on Saturday.
Image: Tumblr
Let us go home when we want to
When we want to go home, WE WANT TO GO HOME. Don’t even waste your time telling us how old and boring we are now that we have jobs.
We can’t hear you over all the money we’re making.
Image: Icanhascheezburger.com
We really, really love you
Despite all of the above, we really love you. We just can’t WhatsApp it to you during work hours.
Image: monkeygag.com
Visit Anja's blog Glitz & Grammar.
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