Anyone have R85 million for me? I need to buy this house

Image: Luxury Portfolio

Guys, I think I’ve found the one. The one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I don’t want to ever be without it again. The only problem is... I ain’t got no money in the bank. And this baby requires a whole lot of money. Some serious dough.

I suppose I can dream... But I’ll just cry myself to sleep knowing our love will never be.

So, why am I so obsessed, you ask? Well, just look at it, for starters. It’s so shiny. I just stared at it like this for 20 minutes:

 

Image: Neowin

Then there’s the fact that it has not one, not two, but SIX BATHROOMS! And six bedrooms. There are 2 fireplaces, air-conditioning throughout, a Japanese Teppanyaki bar (I have no idea what this is, but I want one), and an alfresco amphitheatre.

There’s probably a partridge in a pear tree somewhere too. But, that’s not all, folks.

There’s also a self-contained two-bedroom guest suite, an indoor braai area, sound proof theatre, wine cellar, spa, and an infinity pool.

Excuse me, I need to sit down. I just got dizzy. While I recover, tell me what you think about this not-so-humble abode...

This house is...

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