Does Honesty pay?

The answer to this question is a resounding YES! However the person being honest is not the person who is the beneficiary of this. This may sound a bit off but in today’s climate of greed there is no better industry to be in than the insurance industry.

 Let’s look at a few scenarios here.

1.       1. You go out to dinner, with a partner of your choice, at a reputable eatery and have to leave the table for some or other reason. Seeing as there is someone at the table you leave your belongings there. Your dining partner however all of a sudden needs to take a business call\call of nature and seeing as this is a reputable place they leave everything right there and run quickly to attend to business. Now step in Mr Light Fingers who absconds with your cell phone. You return not noticing much and finish your meal and leave.

2.       2. You go out to dinner but do not take your cell phone with you. While out someone obtains access to your home and relieves you of your cell phone.

3.       3. You are walking in a park with your belongings in a bag, including your cell phone. As you get to the end of your walk you decide to phone a friend but you are pleasantly surprised by the fact that your phone has pulled a Houdini and escaped the confines of your bag. You search walk back along the same path burning twice the calories that you had originally intended but you are unable to find the giggling phone and\or exceptional pickpocket.

The end result of all three scenarios is that you are no longer the proud owner of a communication device to the world which was removed without your consent. (The first one happened to my wife.)

Wait what is this? I’ve been paying insurance, so maybe I can get a replacement device. This will not replace all the good times I shared with my missing partner but we might be able to share some new ones.

So...first notify the Provider of loss, second get a case number from police, third notify insurance company and lastly wait for some answer. Remember the age old saying here...”Honesty is the best policy!”

Mmm... Maybe this was a good thing, that message box was getting VERY big and not even to mention all the movie clips of my cats.

Yay! The insurance company contacted me back! Um...what is this...claim declined due to ...wait for it... negligence.

I’m stumped. What did I do wrong? Was my insurance payment up to date? (Yes) Did I lie to them? (No) Should I have told a White lie? (YES!!!)

I accept that the fact that I will not be getting a replacement phone. But I think in future I’m going to try obfuscating the truth as follows:

Well there I was, sitting in a restaurant writing the finishing touches on my thesis “Insurance companies...the creators of World Peace!” when out of the corner of my eye I noticed someone that looked very familiar. It was the CEO of [insert current insurance company name here]. Wow, I couldn’t believe my luck! I quickly switched apps on my phone and took a photo of this larger than life figure. I hesitated but this had to be done. I

walked up to him slowly and asked ones of his minions if they would deign to take a photo for me...I don’t have to stand next to him I told them...I’ll go stand in the background somewhere. The minion smiled at me and said it wouldn’t be a problem, I must just stand outside the celebrity buffer zone of 4m and they would take they photo for me. I was flabbergasted, I quickly ran around the celebrity zone and went and stood in a corner at the back of the restaurant waving like a kid on stage in his first play.

After standing there for a minute I realised that the minion had disappeared. Oh No! What was I to do? Frantically I began searching for the miscreant but my evil thoughts were unfounded as after just a few minutes he was back having attended to some important business of his own. Phew! What a relief!

I went back to my table to continue with my now cold meal and to stare at my hero. As I sat down there was a sudden explosion of glass and men dressed in black from head to toe came sailing through the window. As his minions took care of a few of them, with accurately thrown cell phones to the face or neck (It’s ok...insurance companies cover broken phones), I noted one of them sneaking up on him.

Not even thinking twice I jumped up sprinting and took out that good for nothing little sneak with a tackle that would of made Pieter van Zyl proud.

Still shaking from the adrenaline rush I got up and his minions took over securing the area. All of a sudden there was a presence behind me and a hand fell on my shoulder. I slowly turned; there he was, smiling slightly. “Thanks for the assistance.” he said. I am ashamed to say I was so overwhelmed that I promptly fainted.

When I recovered from my lapse he and his minions had already left so I returned to my table to pay my bill and go and tell my friends of this wonderful experience with the proof on my mobile. That is when my whole life fell, my phone was no longer there. My dissertation, my photo of him, my life gone...

I’m sitting in an office now, cut-off from the world as I am no longer mobile. At least my payments are up to date.