Women, marriage and society

Women, marriage and society

Litsa Masuku

Walking down the aisle is a desire that virtually every young woman grows up with, a desire that remains in the heart until it transforms into a dream.  A dream that does not come true for everyone, simply because people have different destinies and not everything in life conforms to the desires of the heart.  As the Holy Bible explains that “many are the plans of a man but the will of God shall prevail”.

The mind of the youth can be saturated with fantasies merely because there are social influences that one may be exposed to.  Some of these influences may rose from budding in a particular background or perhaps from spending time with colleagues, friends or role models who are having what you do not. 

Consequently when it comes to marriage, it is a life commitment which could be treacherous if decided upon other people’s lives and not your own.  Because at the end of the day the beauty of the diamond ring does not epitomise all there is to find inside marriage, those who have explored that avenue say it’s a ‘battlefield’ that one has to be prepared for with the mind, body and soul.

Columnist Laura Shortridge shared her profound story on Women24 06th-August-2014.  Based on a personal journey, Shortridge tells society to stop glorifying marriage because marriage is not everything.

“My issue is with the glorification of marriage, or, more specifically the way girls and young women are taught that all we ultimately want and need to succeed in life is to get married.  When I was 17 I fell pregnant and my parents pressured me to get married, well they didn’t really decide to put pressure on me but society decided on their behalf”, says Laura.

An alternative way to scrutinize marriage is that when two people meet in front of a congregation and get to exchange vows in the presence of the community encompassing them, it is no longer entirely about the couple itself but it is about those who were there to chant and ulululate in celebration of that wonderful moment.

“Making that commitment can make people think that you owe that commitment to them, not just your spouse.  Even if you made that commitment when you were too young to know better or whether when you have committed to the wrong person”, Laura added.

Whilst every woman’s dream is to travel the route of marriage that some may have opted to dis-pursue due to different life encounters, Laura’s dream is for society to stop preaching the gospel of marriage to young women, instead young women ought to be encouraged to find their ground within their inner being.  Because as much as marriage seems rosy and fruity, but due to the power that comes with the influence of society, it can also transcend into a damaging and harmful myth.